My list of Top philly comedians/moments:
There are a lot of lists and awards going around for philly comedy right now. So I’ve decided to make my own lists and awards because you know what they say: “If you are a talentless dickhole, call yourself a blogger.”
Dead premises for 2012:
- 5. “Reality tv show that is popular this month.” - This is an open mic, not a commercial on VH1.
- 4. “The shocking 9/11 joke” - it’s been a decade.
- 3. ”I’m a white guy that says the N-word” - congrats you are unbookable
- 2. “Reworked material from famous comics” - we live in the age of google, youtube and smartphones. I will show you what a hack you are as you walk off stage, on my droid, in HD.
- 1. “Anyone here on facebook?” -Are you fucking serious? My dead dog has a facebook account, my mom made it for him.
Top five favorite open mic archetypes:
- 5. The old guy who could have been good if he started standup in 1994
- 4. The homeless guy that is trying to scam money
- 3. The psychotic girl who thinks this is group therapy
- 2. Asshole frat boy and his 6 friends who came to watch his first time on stage
- 1. Any comic that just had a big show and is now back at a mic.
Top 10 comedians I’ve gotten blackout drunk with (2011):
- 10. Chris McGrail (pittsburgh anime con)
- 9. Alex Grubard (Little Bar)
- 8. Jack Martin (NoChe/Hesky’s apartment)
- 7. John Nunn (everywhere)
- 6. Ryan Shaner (after some show in west chester)
- 5. Paul Goodman (for reals, that dentist can drink, drinker’s west)
- 4. Mykal Carter-Jackson (Birthday bar)
- 3. James Hesky (His apartment)
- 2. I can’t remember his name, but it was fucked up
- 1. Brendan Kennedy (wherever fine beverages are sold)
If you didn’t make this list, send me an e-mail so I can include you in my 2012 list of whiny pussies with no self-esteem.
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electricdracula said:
You can put me on that 2012 list…oh, shit. Wait. Nevermind. Fuck you. No. I’m just kidding. I’m sorry, I’m just being a whiny pussy. Fuck. This isn’t working out. How do I just delete this? I’ll try this button…
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