January 2012
6 posts
My Week in Comedy: Jan 14th - 21st
It has been a great week so I figured I would share with all three of you what I’ve been up to.
Saturday: I did the wonderful Porkchop Comedy show in Conshohocken, PA. I got to hang out with a bunch of comics I don’t get to see that often. Including the always irreverent Jim Grammond. If you like tumblr, you’ll love his tumblr. It was a great crowd and they really enjoyed...
The Ballad of Alex Grubard: Cover Letter for open... →
alexgrubard:
To Whom it May Con-soin,
It’s 2012, the year of ourselves, and I’m sitting in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania listening to Todd Glass come out of the closet and I’m writing a cover letter for the position of stand-up comedy booker at to The Late Show with David Letterman. Google Docs doesn’t even…
Jonas Polsky: Comedy Audiences And Taping →
jonaspolsky:
by Jonas Polsky
This evening there was a dust-up about how a young Patton Oswalt handled an audience member videotaping his set. Patton asked if she was taping and the woman responded, “You’re going to want that whole chunk on tape, it was perfect!” I wasn’t there, but that quote underscores…
My list of Top philly comedians/moments:
There are a lot of lists and awards going around for philly comedy right now. So I’ve decided to make my own lists and awards because you know what they say: “If you are a talentless dickhole, call yourself a blogger.”
Dead premises for 2012:
5. “Reality tv show that is popular this month.” - This is an open mic, not a commercial on VH1.
4. “The...
September 2011
9 posts
According to my penis I'm a hipster
I’ve been searching through matches on an online dating website for myself and these are the average attributes of the woman that I have the highest “Match Percentage” with:
Vegetarian
“Total nerd/geek”
Bisexual (usually clearly more lesbian than just bi-curious)
Grad student
Recently returned from some sort of trip from SE Asia
multiple hairstyles
smokes only...
It's Dumb Bullshit and it's All Mine: Bike stuff →
dumbbull:
Please reblog/repost/share this with everyone in Philadelphia, if you know them.
Bike riders of Philly—if I say to you while we’re both riding, “Hey, you know it’s illegal to run a red light/go the wrong way down a one way street/ride on the sidewalk”, don’t look at me with your PBR and coke…
I never write anything long anymore.
I’ve been concentrating on writing shorter and shorter jokes for so long, I think I’m losing my ability to write longer pieces including blog entries. Between tweets and facebook statuses I’ve slowly self-edited myself down to writing micro quotes devoid of all sense of humanity. Well, this is where I’ll change all of that.
I’m going to start posting some creative...
“Should I die an untimely death, please have a rocking band play Forever Young by...”
“Ordering pizza online has cut down on my need to talk to people.”
Life on a bike.
A homeless man asked me if I was Jesus Christ. I said, “No, I’m a standup Comedian.” He replied: “But you aren’t funny.”
“Sleep is my fast forward button through life.”
“No on reads this stupid bullshit anyway.”
art
at every “artists” gathering person there is 1 person worth knowing and 20 worth forgetting. This is all bullshit, but if I write it eloquently enough you won’t believe I used spell check. I just walked though a tropical storm for comedy, no other woman has ever gotten me this wet. Ben Franklin was a mother fucker. When walking through a thunder storm while listening to Ira...
August 2011
3 posts
The Word of Notch: Hey, Bethesda! Let's settle... →
notch:
I am back, and I am excited.
Marriage has been wonderful so far, and nobody sabotaged my computer while I was gone.
The only negative thing going on at this moment is the Scrolls trademark lawsuit nonsense, and I think I came up with the perfect solution:
Remember that scene in Game of Thrones…
It's Dumb Bullshit and it's All Mine: AIDS is not... →
jgrammond:
This is mostly for 4 or 5 of the new, young comics I’ve met or seen recently.
You may think I am a shitty comic; I don’t care about that (although I do). Because regardless of how you feel about my gobbledygook about my wife and cats, what I’m about to say is universally true, and will be backed…
July 2011
1 post
A recent set from a club. blub, blub. →
June 2011
1 post
has-lo:
“The pagans which manufactured the...
May 2011
1 post
April 2011
12 posts
AT-AT for America: The Dream: An AT-AT for America →
atatforamerica:
NERDS OF AMERICA:
We were once a country that made things: giantmetal cars, Hoover Dams, non-AutoTuned popular music.
But now we are stuck in an economy in limbo, surrounded by our Internets, our hipsters and our arguing politicians.
Nerds, I have a great idea to make America great…
Kids Games
This image reminds me of Peter Gabriel’s “Games Without Frontiers”
The clown that waits to kill me
When I was a child my grandmother would make me say my prayers before I would go to sleep every night. My sister and I would kneel down next to our beds and say :
Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to KEEP; if I die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.
You might recognize that prayer from Metallica’s “Enter the Sandman”. I remember being so...
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mcblackwolf asked: Why are you on tumblr? Aren't you a bit too old to be posting alongside 17 year old girls?
“I like staring at blind people.”
– -Alex Pearlman
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